I’ve been faced with self-absorbed, negative, judgemental people a lot in the last few weeks. It can be difficult for me to let that go, but I do! I often have to remind myself that other people’s opinions have nothing to do with me. The truth is I live authentically in my own truth.
IF someone doesn’t subscribe to that, it’s perfectly fine. I am happy with me, and your opinion of me has no bearing on how I live my life. I ask that you keep your judgements to yourself, as they serve no one. Other people do not have to understand your journey! Let me repeat that… Other people do not have to understand your journey!
It has taken me 30 years to finally come to that conclusion!! Once you stop looking for acceptance, validation, and/or approval of others, the better you feel about yourself. I feel as though I have finally jumped into my own life, into my own skin and it feels amazing!! I am never going back, although I’m sure I’ll slip up from time to time. That’s ok too!
I’m sure you are like wow, congrats that’s amazing you stand in that rare place of no longer caring. But that’s not me and it never will be. I am here to say yes it is you and it can be you! I no longer lie in bed coming up with clever comebacks to a comment made yesterday, a month ago, a year ago, or 10 years ago. All those shitty comments, snide remarks, hurtful conversations slide off my back and into the garbage where they belong.
If you struggle with other people’s judgements know that all it takes is a simple mindset shift. I am living how I see fit. I am worthy. I am strong, confident, and content. I forgive and understand others and their motives. I deserve to be happy, successful and fulfilled. I make my own choices and decision. I am loved. I choose happiness.
Other ways to feel confident (and stop seeking approval):
Become aware of your actions when you feel stuck, in doubt, insecure or uncertain in life, and try to see how/why you are seeking approval. If we become more aware of what we are doing, we can more readily change our behavior. Trying to figure out why you need to seek others approval helps to get you unstuck.
Boost your self-worth by focusing on what you are good at. Realizing and noting what you are good at in all areas of your life is like an instant confidence booster. Again self-awareness is key. Try doing Jacob Amado’s personality quiz to gain a deeper understanding of you. https://jacobadamo.com/personality-colors-quiz/
Try positive affirmations to help you accept yourself for who you are. When we learn our truths, it makes it easier to stand in who we are, and less focused on what others think of us. See the affirmations above.
Check if your beliefs are accurate. Meaning is what you think you believe about certain ideas yours or something someone else persuaded you to believe. When someone puts a label or definition of who you are onto you, you do not have to accept that! When another person says gosh you’re lazy, you don’t have to believe that about yourself. You can reflect and decide if you are or are not actually a lazy person. Then let go of that concept and say I am good enough. I am equal to everyone else. I have great worth.
Journal your inadequacies, thoughts, ideas, worries, as a way to further understand yourself, but also as a way to unburden yourself. When you finish turn it around and rewrite it with a positive spin! Writing is cathartic, it helps you dig deeper, reveal truths, learn who you are and where you want to go. You just have to ask yourself the right questions!
Learn to trust the process, yourself, and that it is ok to believe in yourself. Don’t let other people make choices for you, put words in your mouth or head, or build your truths for you! Repel their negativity, hurt, and their perception of your reality.
Holistic Mystic D 